


a heart can lie when clouded by hate

by Anonymous



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Gender Changes, Always Female Stiles Stilinski, Angst, Cis Female Stiles Stilinski, Denial of Feelings, F/M, Female Stiles Stilinski, Male-Female Friendship, Non-Linear Narrative, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Rating May Change, Tags May Change, girl stiles, no beta we die like men, possibly
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-18
Updated: 2021-01-27
Packaged: 2021-03-17 01:08:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,189
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28840656
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: After all the drama they'd gone through; surviving Peter, Hunter, the Kanima, Stiles thought there was something more to her relationship than just reluctant frenemies turned allies. But who is Ms. Blake? And why isn't Derek more concerned with Boyd, his pack, and his recently found not-so-dead sister?
Relationships: Derek Hale/Stiles Stilinski, Jennifer Blake/Derek Hale
Comments: 3
Kudos: 51
Collections: Anonymous





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first time ever writing for this fandom, but quarantine makes you do crazy things. I really like Stiles and Derek's dynamic in the show. Stiles is only female because I just don't know how to write m/m.  
> I gave up watching after season 3 because I really adored Isaac, and I almost didn't get that far because I was really devastated when they killed of Erica AND Boyd and felt they all deserved better. Derek deserved better. Hence, I'm screwing around with 3a canon. I'm assuming all of 1 and 2 took place, just with a female Stiles.  
> I'm not overly interested in writing about the Alpha pack, but I guess we'll see what happens. I'm basically just throwing this out there just because I enjoy angst and it really killed me that while Stiles was saving the lives of basically everyone, Derek was back at the loft going to pound town with Ms. Nasty. Like... why was Derek so drawn to her? To me, it just didn't make much sense so here's me taking a whack at it.
> 
> Comments and criticisms HIGHLY welcomed

It was strange. 

Derek was being strange. 

Scott always thought Derek was strange. The guy was just kind of weird, and he picked weird kids to be in his pack. Maybe it was because they were all broken, and not just in a little way. Broken, beaten, humiliated, burned. That was the Hale pack and those attributes alone describe the Alpha. It made him...strange, but for the most part though Derek’s motives- his priorities, made sense. Derek was always focused on the overall good. And Derek’s ultimate good was his Pack. That was an Alpha’s job. Derek might not have been a great Alpha, but Scott could give credit where credit was due, and that meant he knew Derek tried pretty damn hard. 

So when Isaac and Scott made it down the stairs to Derek, Cora and Boyd unconscious on either side of him, and saw him bleeding out everywhere yet everyone was still alive, it was quite a relief. The first Derek said, though, that was strange. 

“There’s a teacher,” he panted heavily. 

“I’ll take care of her.” He wasn’t looking at either of them. Not Scott or his beta, Isaac.

“Get them out of here.”

Scott and Isaac exchanged glances as if they were in agreeance that it was _strange_ for the Alpha to dictate others take care of his precious packmate and his newly found sister. That should be his role as an Alpha, not to take care of some teacher- some innocent life unrelated to him, but to take care of his surviving pack.

Instead of voicing the strangeness of the Alpha’s statement, Scott moved to Boyd as Isaac went to Cora. 

It was probably for the best that none of them be recognized, least of all by a teacher, so boys made a hasty retreat back up the stairs. They needed to get the injured back to Derek’s loft as soon as possible, before any other school staff arrived. 

It was still…. Weird. Off in some way. Why would Derek not be more concerned with his recovered beta and long lost sister?

Scott didn’t have the time to ponder such things, he just hiked Boyd higher on his shoulder to redistribute the weight and soldiered on quickly. Isaac was halfway up, not daring to disobey his Alpha. Scott hesitated briefly, looking back to see Derek opening a large metal gate. 

“Scott, we need to leave,” came Chris’ voice, drawing Scott back to the task at hand. 

It was only after safely getting Boyd and Cora back to the loft that Scott bothered to check his phone only to find over a dozen missed calls from Stiles. 

**Did you find Boyd and Erica?**

_**Missed call. Missed call.** _

**Scott, answer your PHONE!**

_**Missed call.** _

**Who is Cora??**

**NVM. Peter explained.**

_**Missed call. Missed call. Missed call.** _

**I took Lydia home.**

**We need to talk, heading to the hospital now.**

**Something’s going on.. I’m not sure what it is yet.**

**_Missed call._ **

**I’m going to assume you're all fine, since you're not answering you FREAKING PHONE.**

**Meet me at the hospital morgue, we need to talk.**

Half a dozen missed calls and her final message.

**Is...Derek okay?**

Scott knew that Stiles and Derek had gotten closer. Hell, she was the only reason they were on speaking terms. She spent all summer going back and forth between them. Derek was pissed at Scott and Scott just wanted to take the summer to improve himself, he wanted a normal life as much as possible. The studying, the workouts, the lacrosse practices; normal things normal high schoolers did during their summer breaks. He was going to transform into a new person by the time Allison came back….

Allison…. 

Scott wouldn’t change a single moment about how things went down with Gerard, but it was Stiles beating him over the head repeatedly with the fact that Scott did as everyone always does to Derek. Used him. Scott eventually felt bad about it, but he didn’t fully understand Stiles’ rage about it. “Boys,” she had said. “So fucking dense.” Scott had snarked something back, about how she was just as dense as any dude and she just rolled her eyes and swatted him in the arm and laughed. Her laugh didn’t quite reach her eyes though, and Scott noticed that. Maybe he wasn’t as dense as Stiles’ assumed.

He noticed a lot of things now (the joys of being a werewolf), even if he was a little slow on putting it together.

It wasn’t until Scott reread that last message a few times that it finally clicked. The third heartbeat, the teacher, wasn’t afraid. It was steady.

  
  


***

After Stiles covered the body back up, she turned to Scott, the serious look still etched on her pale face.

“Dude. This is… really bad, isn’t it.”

Scott heard it, she wasn’t asking a question, it was a statement.

“There’s an Alpha pack _kidnapping_ and _torturing_ children and there’s someone else _murdering_ innocent children. What a way to start a new year.”

Stiles glanced back once more at the body of the boy she used to know. That not but 48 hours ago was alive, celebrating turning 17.

“Yeah, a new year with a new and improved me. That means no skipping. Come on, let’s get to school.”

They were silent in the Jeep, both taking in everything that had happened, processing it, and trying to understand what was going on. 

Scott glanced at her briefly, watched as she made those typical Stiles faces. Scrunched up nose, biting her lips, eyes twitching slightly. He knew her mind was working a mile a minute and he could smell the worry that rolled off of her in waves. It had taken him a long time to finally put that one together, that her scent changed with emotions. He was just so used to everything that was Stiles, he just never seemed to notice. Maybe he was dense. 

Stiles didn’t ask Scott what he was sure was on her mind. He wasn’t going to wait, instead he just offered up the information.

“Derek was taking care of some teacher last I saw him. I’m sure the creep just threatened them to keep their mouth shut. Ya know, do the whole dark and mysterious spiel, maybe throw in a threatening eyebrow or two.”

The comment startled Stiles out of her silence, a gurgly laugh escaping her throat.

“He’s pretty good at that, isn’t he? I bet if you gave his eyebrows pen and paper, they could write a whole novel.”

Scott blanched, but gave a half-grin.

“I don’t think that dude’s eyebrows would be any more forthcoming with dialogue than he is with verbal communication.”

The silence resumed, surprising in and of itself considered Stiles is usually talking about anything to fill the silence. It appeared neither one of them were up much for talking about what was really on their minds. 2 people dead, another person missing, and Erica.

“He can communicate, you know. When he wants to,” Stiles said quietly, and paused, chewing on her lip again.

“Do you...do you want to talk about it?” Scott asked, completely serious. He may not have been the greatest friend lately, and he might don’t like Derek, but he would always be there if she wanted to talk.

“Talk about what? About how this is going to be the year I kick your ass up and down the lacrosse field?” Stiles joked. 

Scott wasn’t willing to push the issue. If there was ever something to tell, he’s sure Stiles would share when she was ready.


	2. Chapter 2

Things kept getting worse. One day later, less than 24 hours, another kid is missing and Stiles is convinced it’s because they’re a virgin… and they’re going to be sacrificed. She was sure of it. Three is a pattern, and four is about to be a serial killer. And Stiles, well, she’s a virgin too. Maybe she should talk to someone about this. Maybe Scott will have better insight, she thought, a more plausible explanation and less virgin sacrifice-y. Stiles was always the one who jumped to drastic conclusions, Scott was the more level headed one. Her antics and overactive mind didn’t make her any less right though, she mused. Sometimes having such a brilliant mind was a curse. 

Stiles had just pulled into the school parking lot for cross country practice, expecting to be the only one on this side of the parking lot when she spotted Ms. Blake darting into the building.

Huh, that’s strange. Usually, it’s only athletes and Coach Finstock here this early. Stiles shrugged, fine by her. Teachers' comings and goings weren’t particularly interesting.

Hoping to talk to her about the upcoming book in class, Stiles rushed to grab her gym bag and backpack to trail after the teacher into the school. She slung the bags over her shoulders and skittered inside, her sneakers obnoxiously squeaky on the smooth floor. She was almost to the classroom door when she heard it. The shock of recognition froze her in place not but a few feet from the closed door. The deep timbre of the man she’d know anywhere.

A lighter voice twittered back in response to whatever Derek had said and then she heard something that was a stab right in Stile’s heart. A small chuckle. Derek’s chuckle. His laugh. It wasn’t in the sarcastic way Stiles was used to hearing it, the few times she had ever actually had heard it.

“Well, why don’t you start by telling them it’s an allegory for McCarthyism,” Derek said, voice almost..playful. Something Stiles had never associated with the man before. Her chest felt tight like someone had reached their hands inside her chest cavity and squeezed to hold her lungs and heart hostage. She couldn’t make out what the person, Ms. Blake, had said in response. Stiles was too busy trying to process that Derek was here in school. In a classroom. Chatting (flirting?) with a teacher.

Suddenly the door opened, the motion enough to break Stiles out of shock and send her scrambling back. It wasn’t possible to make it look like she wasn’t eavesdropping, but didn’t need to smack in front of the door.

“Who are you?” Ms. Blake asked breathily, shyness evident in her voice.

A long pause and then “I’m Derek,” came the response, said man finally stepping into the hall where Stiles was trying to get her composure. 

That hurt. What the fuck was that. Did she just walk in on her teacher and Derek  _ flirting  _ with each other? Derek doesn’t flirt. At least, he doesn’t flirt in the normal way everyone else flirts. Stiles thought his flirting was soft yet serious eyebrows and sentences with no punctuation, with some manhandling thrown in. She thought… she thought she and Derek flirted. Stiles had some serious re-evaluating she needed to do, but it would have to be later because the apparent expert flirt-er was walking towards her.

“Heyyy, Derek. My bushy Sourwolf. Well, not my Sourwolf. I know you're not mine, I mean...You know what I mean. It’s funny running into you here! Or I guess, maybe not so funny and more just interesting. It’s interesting because you probably went to school here and I’ve just never really thought about that until.. just now I guess. Anyways, I was hoping to catch Ms. Blake to talk to her about maybe doing a different book in class, since I read the Crucible like 3 years ago for fun, ya know? Do you know Ms. Blake? You must since you were just in her classroom. Not like it’s any of my business whose room you're in..” She trailed off, she knew she was rambling. It’s just what she did when her anxiety spiked and she was unsure of how to react; word vomit just spewing everywhere without her control.

Derek had just kept strolling all through her yapping, almost past her. He paused briefly and gave her a side-eye. The look was almost like a slap in the face, it was cold and almost vacant. A complete 180 to what she thought she heard in the classroom, no hint of playfulness or humor.

“Derek. I’m… I’m so sorry about Erica.” It was the wrong thing to say, Derek looked away from her and gave a small snort. Stiles forged ahead, she needed to get it out and wanted him to know.

“I’m here for you if you want to talk about it.”

“Why would I ever need you.” It wasn’t a question. Righteous indignation burned hot on her face. 

“Well, maybe you might need someone, aka this girl, because apparently there’s a super powerful freaking Alpha Pack roaming around town and there are three dead virgins and possibly a fourth missing, presumed dead. Yeah, that’s right people are dying and I’m the one who found that pattern. Oh and your long lost not dead sister just magically appears? That’s super convenient. Not sure what it means, but you’re not too upset by it considering how you just shipped her off with Isaac, Scott, and Boyd. Yeah, Scott filled me in about that one, since you’ve been ignoring my messages for days. What’s the point of even having a-”

“Shut up,” Derek growled, cutting her off and walking away before Stiles could get another word out. “Just, stay away. Spaz,” he spat out before disappearing around a dark corner in typical Hale fashion.

Stiles felt the beginnings of hot tears prick her eyes, but she didn’t have time for it. Forget talking to Ms. Blake, she needed to get to cross country practice and talk to talk. Screw Derek Alpha Hale and his cold words. 

“You said I didn’t have to stay away anymore,” she whispered to no one. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I usually write longer chapters, but I really wanted to get this cranked out. I also did a little bit of editing on chapter 1. I hope you guys enjoy!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Snippets

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize again for the short chapter. I will write longer ones eventually. Enjoy! All comments and criticism are welcome.

_ Stiles was alone in her room. Jackson was alive, Gerard had fucked off to who knows where, Scott was ready for a transformative summer, and here Stiles was licking her wounds. Again. Alone. Like always. _

_ “Nah, no worries about the very bruisable, breakable human. No sir.” _

_ Glancing in the mirror, she assessed the damage along her bare torso. Nothing was broken, she was pretty sure. Just bruised to shit, _

_ “I feel as good on the outside as I do on the inside now. At least for the most part I’ll be able to cover it all. Except for the face. Why’d he have to go for the face?” _

_ She shuffled more slowly and meekly than she had in the past few hours because right now she didn’t have to be tough, making her way to the bed while swiping up a baggy sweatshirt to pass out in. She planted face down into the pillows, unwilling to move to pull the covers up. _

_ “Dying here like this would be okay, I think.” _

_ “Hardly,” a sarcastic voice answered.  _

_ Stiles didn't need to look up, she knew exactly who it was. Only two people ever bothered to creep through her window and one of those people was too busy at the moment to give a flying frick about their best friend. Too busy chasing after his deadly Juliet to possibly be the one crawling through Stiles' window. Besides, Scott hadn't done it in months. That meant there was only one person who it could be. Even if she didn't know where Scott was right now, she didn't need anything to tell her it was Derek. It was always Derek. Has always been Derek. Will always be Derek, a traitorous thought supplied her hazy mind.  _

_ The only one who would ever actually bother to make sure she was okay. Okay was a relative term at this point. _

_ “Are you going to tell me why you’re here, or are you just going to brood silently like you always do?” _

_ Her words might have been impossible for a human to decipher, considering everything was spoken directly into her pillows, but she knew he heard her. _

_ “You’re hurt.” _

_ “Yes, thank you Captain Obvi-Sourwolf.” _

_ He didn’t say anything, and she was too tired to prod more so she waited. _

_ “You won’t have to worry about him again, Stiles. I promise.” _

_ He left, and her heart felt more tender in her chest than the bruises on her body. He knew Gerard used her, just like Scott used Derek, but to Stiles, the ends don’t justify the means. _

_ “I’m sorry. I promise, too.”  _

***

_ “You can’t just keep coming at him head-on, dumbass!” _

_ Jackson’s body had hit the ground with a thud and Isaac was snickering on the side, happy to not be the one Derek was knocking around. The training session wasn’t getting very far, and Stiles wondered if it was always like this. Derek just pounding on his kiddos. _

_ “Shut up, Stiles,” Jackson groaned out. _

_ Derek’s eyes flashed red and then he was gripping Jackson roughly by the shirt and hauling him to his feet. Derek growled into Jackson’s face. _

_ “Apologize.” _

_ “What the hell, why? It’s Stiles.” _

_ “Don’t tell her to shut up.” _

_ Stiles felt the heat in her cheeks and she was thankful no one was looking at her, even if they could all tell she was embarrassed. Jackson looked taken aback for a moment, before a smirky grin formed on his face with an expression of annoyance.  _

_ “You tell her that all the time. Actually, you’re like straight-up abusive towards her. Always manhandling her. You can’t tell me not to do what you do.” _

_ Derek didn’t like that response and growled louder, deeper, and flashed his eyes once more. Jackson looked down, cowed by his Alpha. _

_ “Whatever,” Derek shoved Jackson back, the guy barely caught himself from landing flat on his ass. _

_ “Again.” _

***

_ Scott had passed out, the pain rendering him unconscious.  _

_ “All this for a stupid tattoo,” Stiles whined and gave a small shutter while glancing at her friend. _

_ “Sometimes it’s nice to reward yourself,” Derek said quietly, letting the dark-haired boy enjoy a few pain-free minutes. _

_ “Stiles snorted. “Severe pain is a reward? Well, I guess in your world it probably is, haa…. Sorry, that was mean. Foot, meet mouth. I really need to stop doing that, anyway. What do you reward yourself with Derek?” _

_ “You’re not wrong.” _

_ “Dude, I am wrong. It wasn’t nice to say; I don’t mean to be cruel.” _

_ “That’s all I deserve.” _

_ “That’s not true, Derek. Maybe if you stopped trying to keep people away, you’d get that through your gorgeous skull. Like, I don’t even know where you live right now! It can’t be this burned-out husk. A growing wolf pack needs food and there clearly isn’t any here! What do you do, run around and eat the wildlife? Wait, don’t actually tell me that, just tell me you have a real roof over your heads.” _

_ It was silent for a moment. _

_ “I have a loft.” _

_ “Oh yeah? Not what I’d picture for a werewolf lair. Lair? Den? Whatever. You should probably let Scott know where it is, though. Just in case.” _

_ “I’ll tell you.” _

_ Her heart stuttered. “Really? I’d think you'd want me, of all people to stay away.” _

_ “You don’t have to stay away anymore.” _


End file.
